Well, it’s the end of day 2! Actually earlier today I was excited for it to be day 3 so I’d be 10% done. It’s not so bad actually. First of all, I thought I’d be in a much worse spot without my coffee, especially on day 2. I’ve felt relatively stable with a brief 20 minute withdrawal headache, but nothing extreme. I did have a bathroom “emergency” today that was preceded by some very intense cramps. I’ve been on antibiotics and pain meds for an ear infection recently, so I’m not sure how much of that episode was due to the meds or the paleo.
I woke up with my daughter Aria requesting oatmeal, which was painful, because I freaking love eating oatmeal for breakfast. I had no idea what I was going to eat, other than NOT eggs. I brainstormed while make the kids that beautiful, delicious oatmeal and came up with a smoothie for breakfast. Dumped some frozen fruit, spinach and almond milk into the blender and pressed the button. Of course something heinous occurs and I break the blender. The food processor was used the night before for the Sunshine Sauce on the Paleo Pad Thai, so making a smoothie became so much more difficult and would involve washing dishes before any food consumption. Sucked!
Went to the gym and felt decent on the elliptical. Definitely didn’t feel very energized and was noticing the time ticking by for sure.
Fast forward through my bathroom blitz and I made it to my first Derby Lite roller derby boot camp. I LOVED it. It was such a blast getting out there with other beginners and learning the basics. I felt so energized and on a serious fun high at the end. I can’t wait for next week.
I’m fighting back sleep right now for sure. I’m going to listen to my body and drift off.
After a week and change of eating paleo, I decided to have a few glasses of wine last night. Wellll, this has been an interesting day of recovery. I feel cruddy. I feel like I poisoned my body (which I did) and all it wants to do is purge clean (which it is). What I find even more telling, is my behavior under the influence. I haven’t been hungry this whole week, but last night a few hours after dinner I was ravenous and ate a bunch of fruit leathers. Decent choice, yes, but only because there wasn’t anything forbidden for me to grab. For the past two weeks, my nail biting habit has gone on hiatus and wouldn’t you know, I chomped down two nails last night. Putting these pieces together is blowing my mind. There you have it ladies and gentlemen, food and drink really do influence your behavior, mood and compulsions.
It’s been a full week of cutting out 99% of the processed foods, sugar, flour, grains and dairy that have always been a part of my life. I feel FANTASTIC. I really feel like a different person.
1- The endless sugar/carb loop has died. I never did the simple math here. I’d have a fiberOne bar (thinking I was a hot shot good choice maker) and even though it was chock full of fiber, from god knows where, I’d want to have another one immediately after. Without realizing it, the whole day, I’d actually be thinking about where I was going to get my next pseudo-good-choice fix. Fruit leather? Special K cereal? Yogurt? Since cutting out ALL of these foods, I have no urges to get or keep a sugar high.
In preparation for my whole30 challenge, it is recommended for each person to take a thoughtful look at their goals. For me, goal-setting for things in my life sometimes feels daunting and a little bit scary. When I set out to accomplish something tangible, I’m very much a person who likes to see a project through to completion. There’s an indescribable satisfaction to be done and moving on. But life doesn’t work that way and I think that’s why I’ve had a lifetime of personal goal failure, to the point where I don’t set them anymore. Goals in life are on-going. It’s kind of like healthy eating, you’re never done with healthy eating; you can’t cross it off your to-do list. Its just forever there, as something you have to think about and complete, day after day. Ughhhh so tiring! I’m still trying to figure out my systems to simplify this particular aspect of life, and overall, I’m like a child with these personal goal things. I really have no idea how to do it and to integrate it and not treat it like something with a start and end date.
So I’m making lots of progress with fitness as a way of life and I’m ready to make it a full package. Here are my whole9 goals for my first whole30.
I’ve decided to start my first run at Whole30 on January 4, 2013. I’ve already been eating paleo for a few days now, but there are a few treats that I allow myself. In fact, when I look at these things, I’ve pretty much allowed myself to believe that they somehow “don’t count”. It’s true that I’m allowed to eat whatever combination of paleo/non-paleo that feels right, but I also want to experience what a 100% clean feeling feels like. For me, this means cutting out my coffee, coffee-mate hazelnut fat free creamer, and alcohol.
The past few months I’ve been paying attention to my health, listening to my body, reacquainting myself with the cues and instincts of a healthy person. After experiencing constant pain starting in March 2012, with what turned out to be herniated discs, I’ve felt awakened in a number of ways. My habits, somehow after all of this time, were (and still are) basically a form of self-abuse and against basic common sense. It’s like my body has forgotten what is good for it. But what I’m finding over this slow process is that it’s my mind that is conducting all the shady business and my body is being overpowered, ignored, and suppressed. This realization has rocked my understanding of everything. I look admiringly at those who “know” their body, respond to its needs, and have rock solid values that promote their own well-being. I’d like to journey into that world, I’d like to treat myself better and pass those behaviors and ideas to my children.